no.19 ta da! dudes from me childhood... :D

thon calls this pic "men without hats" - left to right are alf, thon, rob

photos above taken at thon's wedding 6 nov 2010:
alf/kah chua (left) & rob/bond/the loo (right),
the small one & 3 smaller ones (centre),


below: jannah and me at thon's wedding
(photo taken by aidan)


below: christen at thon's wedding (photo taken by aidan)


below: aidan at thon's wedding, after just coming back from suzhou trip that morning 6am same day (photo taken by jenny)



above: me and my bro (photo taken in 2003)

below: photo, taken 4 years ago, is titled "DUMB & DUMBER"
- who says dumb & dumber can't be cool??? LOL

no.18 Ah?? Me, A Missionary??!

http://www.omfisaan.org/?p=426

writer: Marten Visser

How do you know whether you have a call to be a missionary? People often ask me this, especially young people. My best answer is: the question is wrong.
 
The Bible does not teach us that God reveals His children His plan for their lives. That is also true for missionaries, as well as for pastors and church leaders. Many people are looking for a special calling from God when they are thinking about missionary work or serving in a church. I want to be clear about that: That is not necessary.

People are expecting a special calling through a God-given impression, a Bible text that speaks in a special way to your heart, or special circumstances that point the way. But: an impression is just an impression. A Bible text means what is says in the context of the Bible. Special circumstances can always be explained differently.

To look for God’s guidance in this way therefore leads to a lot of uncertainty. That fact should be enough to make us question this concept of God’s call. The Lord is more than capable to make us clear what He means. That so many people have hesitations about their calling, is not His fault. It even does not have to do with that we are not listening. It mainly has to do with the fact that many people think about God’s call in the wrong way.

The Lord does not lead first of all through speaking to our heart. First of all, He leads us through His Word. In the Bible we find many commandments that teach us how to live. In the Bible we read what is important to God, and how he involves people in His plans.

As we grow in faith, more and more we get the desire to serve God. But how? The answer is simple: you may decide for yourself. God gives His children the freedom to, within the boundaries of His revealed will, make decisions for their own lives.

So whether you become an accountant in the US, build an electricity network in rural Africa, or plant churches in Thailand, it’s all good. Whether you volunteer for your church, start a Bible study with unchurched people, expend your energy in raising your children in the fear of the Lord, or show the members of your sports club what it means to live with Jesus, it’s all allowed.

In saying this, I do not mean that these are all good things, and that you have to find out what God’s intention for you personally is. No, these are all good things, and these are all good things for you (with the possible exception of giving all your energy to raising your children, which I do not beieve is a biblical option for men). That realization takes away the pressure.

The most important is the desire to serve God. When you live close to Him, that desire grows. That makes the chance that you want to devote your life to full-time service in church or mission bigger. But how you serve God, and in what kind of position, will also be dependent on your ability and opportunity to serve.

Your ability to serve include your spiritual gifts, your talents, your experiences and your personality. These will all ensure that your are a good fit for some ministries and would be unhappy and, more important, less effective in other ministries. Your opportunity to serve is the circumstances you find yourself in. Your age, health, finances, and where you live are all important factors that determine which ways to serve are better or less suited for you.

The most important for living according to God’s will therefore is a deep and growing desire to serve Him. That will also be displayed in a character that is more and more like Jesus’. It a notable fact that in the New Testament lists of requirements for elders, always character traits are mentioned. An internal calling is never mentioned.

The only question you need to ask when you live close to God, is: “Does this honour God?”, and: “Does this suit me?”. When you have answered these questions honestly, in important cases together with other Christian whom you respect as spiritual leaders, you may continue on the path that seems best to you. You do not have to fear that you are missing out on a secret plan for your life that God has in store for you.

For God determines everything. He determines which number you roll with a dice (Proverbs 16:33). If even a small thing like that is determined by Him, you may be confident that He has a plan for your life. For He is a God who works all things according to the counsel of His willl (Ephesians 1:11). ‘All things’ certainly includes the details of your life. And HE will make sure it happens!

In the Bible there are many examples that God leads in a special way. In the New Testament it already seems rarer than in the Old Testament. It seems probable to me that with the completion of the Holy Scriptures the Lord allows His children to make their own adult choices, based on His revealed will.

This of course does not exclude that God may still make His will clear in a special way. But we should not be expecting that (neither should we expect that he will not), and we should not wait for it.

In summary: 
God’s call = the desire to serve God + the ability + the opportunity.

My reply:

thanks for sharing, Marten!

this morning i heard a missionary's sharing, and i thought... "what if i am called to be a missionary today... ?". so i decided to go through your website to look for a hint :)

your article makes God's "calling" clearer. aren't we all missionaries for God, everyday, everywhere, as long as the heart is willing? even if the path or the opportunity is unclear, i've to believe he will lead us according to his will, just as he had led Jonah, moses, esther, peter, paul, etc...

today, i'm reminded how God's way is usually never anything close to our way, and i'm also reminded once again to walk in faith.

blessings!!

no.17 Bangkok My Other Home

bus ticket from bangkok city to airport 30baht, 45min ride, pink tickets for ladies and blue for men

above photo: i really love the candidness of events on this train track. the track cuts through the busy sukhumvit road, just below an overhead highway bridge. i've to wait for the track to clear before walking towards the skytrain station.

above: an elephant passing by street zhi char stall & diners like me, asking for "donations".

above: entrance to sukhumvit soi 1

above pic: it doesn't rain in bangkok, it pours!! (2009)

  

above video: skytrain - glimpses of bangkok city to airport (2010)

 

i love prata, thai style! this is our regular prata street stall near sukhumvit soi 1. freshly made prata with banana filling, generous sprinkle of sugar and condensed milk! just 10 baht per serve!! (me regular customer since 2007)

no.16 Heaven is where God is - & God is with me

^{Ephesians 3:20
20}Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, ²¹to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.

every time i want to ask God for something, i hesitate. cos i know He will answer and deliver what i ask for, only in ways i do not like - he'd be ploinking me into some deep deep shit that i can't seem to tahan.

some people call this "suffering"...

When we ask God for Patience
- does he give us Patience?

When we ask God for Courage
- does he give us Courage?

What he gives us are...
OPPORTUNITIES.


my last prayer was so open ended. "Lord, what do u want of me and my life?" - i was too afraid to ask but i still uttered the words... yet, though i know what's coming (the storm before the sunshine), i never prepared myself for the unimaginable(s)!

so what am i rambling about?

i've prayed and now i get what i ask for...

i'm in deep deep shit!! It STINKS!

it's an answer for me to discover, learn, appreciate, embrace... through a series of trials and intense difficulties... God has answered, will answer again...

but i also just uttered another prayer, "God!! i can't take it any more! i feel like giving up... i can't go on like this! i don't want to suffer..."

and i guess i can see Him answer me with a little cheeky smile and a loving nudge:

the answer is "faith". 

wtf - wat kind of answer is that?

i got a hint of an answer at church yesterday. so through the sermon yesterday, i prayed for "eyes of faith"

- to see God - not through my eyes - because then, i'll limit myself, i'll stand too short, i'll be unable to reach, i'll be unable to see God's answer...

i have no idea how to proceed, except...

i must take the LEAP OF FAITH and trust on God's love. 

(and wtf does that mean??!)

so, i'll just plough on.

oh ya, ah ha, ah... ?? ??

after all, i'm a precious child of God...
And, i'm now in Heaven, where God will always be with me...

"Lord, what do u want of me and my life? 

I am here..."

me, nette

no.15 bored bored bored

k, now i'm bored and bothered. i am agonizing over a pile of work and nothing seems to be getting done!! about 11 hours ago via web

@elusivehearts impossible deadlines are the everyday peeves... and i'm utterly bored with that. bored bored bored lol about 13 hours ago via web in reply to elusivehearts

i'm bored. and irritated. and tired. but i'm bored first. lol about 14 hours ago via web




7/2/2011
omg look at howie!! wtf is he thinking??!! LOL

 

photoshopped howie

 

VS

 

 

"normal" howie lol 

no.14 Home Cooked Meals & Cravings!!!

EXPLODING YUMMINESS!!!


food diary 5 May 2011
peranakan mee siam! with assam kuah, prawn sambal... my childhood favourite!!

pic: alow's mee siam recipe & mama's traditional bowl - best of my 2 grandma's!!

food diary 12 April 2011
simple home cooked meals - rice with sambal goreng (tempe, tau kua & long beans), whitebait omelette, fried fish coated with kunyit stuffed with pounded chillis... wow

food diary 22 Jan 2011
suddenly, i just felt like having liver (felt horribly tired on the day - forgot to take a pic).


pork liver sliced thinly & marinade with: 
oyster sauce, 
light/dark soya, 
white pepper, 
chinese wine, 
pinch of cornflour

prep: 
sliced garlic
sliced ginger
sliced chillis
sliced spring onions
sliced corriander 

wok fry garlic, ginger, chillis (large fire). add marinaded pork. add water if gravy wanted. finish with spring onions and corriander. serve hot with steamed rice. wow. :D


today it was lamb chops seasoned with salt, pepper pinch of herbs, then pan fry. since i had mini portabella mushrooms, they were fried with salt & pepper, some onions, garlic and a bit of tomatoes. simple dish, lots of flavour... but now, i'm thinking of my pork liver again :)

also love teochew style pig's trotter stew in black soya sauce to go with fragrant steamed white rice... very interesting how cultures can just mix - this dish is either enjoyed with the authentic teochew sng-me-chou (chilli, raw garlic & white vinegar mix) or with my peranakan balachan chilli (chilli, balachan, limau purut & lime juice)!

chicken wings are a hot favourite! wings with beer batter (should have shaken off excess flour, but then...)

food diary 12 Sept 2010 Sun
never underestimate a simple dish that looks a little bit squeeshy :) fried brinjal with good salted fish, garlic, seasoned with soya, salt, white pepper and a touch of sugar goes a long long way with hot steamed rice! add minced pork, chopped spring onions, sliced chillis and the dish is complete as a meal with plain steamed rice! can't wait to have it again!!



food diary 4 Sept 2010 Sat
my daddy's birthday and we went for a restaurant meal.
the biggest and crispiest dish... the suckling pig!!! YUM








food diary 22 August 2010 Wed
soup and rice - this is the all-time family favourite meal... soup soup soup - steamboat, chicken macaroni soup, kiam chye soup, hae mee soup (prawn soup with pork rib and kuey teow), ayam soto, chye huei soup (bek chye soup with her pior), bakwan kepeting...

been cooking bakwan kepeting for years - once a year every year for the past 10 years or so, only during chinese new year - then, there's only me enjoying the soup and meatballs with belachan and steamed rice. i'll be enjoying it for reunion dinner (mama's version), at mommy's dining table (alow's "tennis balls") and at home (my own version) - since everyone cooks them only during CNY!

and then, this year, the kids suddenly LOVE it!! yay! so i get to eat it more often than once-a-year during the CNY... and now, it's so much easier to cook when i use frozen crab meat hehehe... beats having a crab cut on my finger when peeling crabs!




food diary 11 August 2010 Wed
tried a recipe over the weekend - one dish i haven't had for about 20 years... alow's siamese curry... made 2 mistakes >> used packet coconut milk (YUCK!) and too much assam pueh :(
other than that, the recipe is sooooo easy.

ah ha! look at my lovely seasoned wok!!


food diary 5 August 2010 Thu
omg... just look at my nasi lemak breakfast (below)...


food diary 30 july 2010 saturday
today i had cravings for alow's laksa lemak with chicken... so got it cooked right from scratch...


last week i fried rice with ham and egg... so incredibly simple and satisfying!!!! yummm...


HUNGRY now!!! but don't think i should eat... restrain nette :(
masak uppa tomorrow ah?

no.13 PIG, HAM, BACON: COME! (http://www.omfisaan.org)

Story: Pig, Ham, Bacon: Come!
ref: http://www.omfisaan.org/?p=381#more-381
(http:///www.omfisaan.org)

Thai people have beautiful names. Only they are seldomly used. They are written in documents and said at official occasions. But in everyday life, only the nickname is used.

To outsiders, the nicknames can have a funny ring. ‘Bird’ is the most common name, followed by ‘Small one’. From a western perspective, that is quite accurate to describe most Thai, yet something doesn’t seem quite all right when a sturdy guy with a beer belly is called ‘Small one’. Yet it is as common as hearing a teeny-weeny woman being addressed as ‘Fatty’.


Nowadays, often English names are used. These names don’t necessarily need to be words that are fitting names to western ears. ‘Bank’ is the most common name. It sounds nice, and it clearly shows where the priorities of the family are. A while ago I met ‘Dollar’. For, his father explained to me, he had to work abroad to be able to pay the bride price, so he called his first child ‘Dollar’.

The English vocabulary of most Thai however is fairly limited. To keep it simple, common names within one family are A, B, and C. It starts to become a bit more confusing when English names are combined with Thai tone jokes. (Thai is a tonal language.) What are the names of your sons? Joe, Joe, and Joe. For a while I didn’t look too intelligent, but slowly it dawned. Every Joe had his own tone. But which tone belonged to which Joe never became quite clear to me.

The funniest combination I heard from a colleague. She was shopping when she heard a mother call her children: Moo! Come! So far, so good. ‘Moo’ means ‘Pig’, which hardly is a complimentary name in my book, but still cracks the top-10 of popular names in Thailand. But next came: Ham! Come! Bacon! Come! And there they came, running to their mother. She went home with her car full of meats.

My Comments:

hello Marten! hope you're well! love the website and stories... and what a lovely house without glass!

when i was young and lived near a local village in singapore, many chinese people were officially named after animals. one lady, who used to cycle by our home 2 hours every morning to help my grandma with housework, was called "Ah Zhu" (means "pig" in hokkein, a chinese dialect). another popular name was "Ah Gao" (dog). i've heard that the story behind naming children after animals was that the parents needed to protect their babies from being taken away by evil spirits. by calling out animal names, they hope that the evil spirits will be fooled into thinking that there are no children around... well, that's how the saying goes. anyway, i always thought it was rude to greet "Aunty Pig", even if it was really her name and she accepted it pretty gracefully.

sets me thinking about parents who will do anything to protect their children, even if it meant selling them or giving them away (this is very common in singapore too - but more in the past when people had debts and no money to feed their children - my own grandmother was one of these children who was "given away" - usually a girl is given away so that she can be of help around the house of the adopted family).

so back to my thoughts on parenthood - think it must be a huge comfort when any parent can understand and appreciate how our God is like a protecting, loving father, and that everything He plans and does for us are always in our best interest, even if it's a painful experience...

was just sharing with my 2 boys about how Jesus taught the Lord's prayer - Jesus starts the prayer as "Our Father," and not "My Father"... this helps me realize how wonderful it is to be given (a Gift) the privilege of being a child of God - not by good works, or by good behaviour, or by being born to a christian/catholic family...

i found it funny that the boys then ask me who they should consider their real father - Andrew or God? hmmm... got stuck there! lol anyway, my answer was simply this - Andrew is their "earth father" and God is their "heavenly father" - now they have 2 fathers caring for them at the same time, 2 fathers to run to for anything...

keep writing!! it's lovely reading the blogs and learning more about your experiences!

God Bless!!
jeannette

no.12 EXPLODED!! rash! rash!! all over me face & body!! wtf!!

omg what happened?!

disgusting skin problem on my foot!! (above)

april
disgusting foot - skin problem on heel (above)
doctor gave fungal cream for disgusting leg - no change
skin got worse again - itchy, dry up, split, bleed, heal
- same cycle every week
finally swollen from infection

end may
doctor gave antibiotics (amoxycillin 500mg+clavulanic 125mg 15tab)
& cream for disgusting leg (swollen1) - got better
skin got worse again - dried, split, bleed, heal
- same cycle every week

end june
disusting leg (swollen2) + rash on shin in early june
- among rash are tiny red dots and some tiny blisters with blood
doctor refers me to skin specialist

7/7/2010 wed
saw the skin specialist

8/7/2010 thu
did swaps, fungal tests, biopsy in 3 areas on leg (pain leh!!)
took antibiotics that night - cephalexin 250mg capsule

9/7/2010 fri - 11/7/2010 sun
rash spreads (tiny dots)

12/7/2010 mon
4pm last dose of antibiotics because...
by 7pm, rash on face flare up - red blotches

13/7/2010 tues
face rash appears (red, blotchy)
eyelids swell, eyes look half closed
body rash all over - except covered areas, hands/palms
doctor says it's eczema.
gives antihistomine (hydroxyzine 10mg)
& enzyme (serratiopeptidase 5mg)

14/7/2010 wed
eyelids swell more - can't drive boys to school
went to skin centre to see proxy doctor
doctor says face rash not the same type as body rash
think drug allergy to antibiotics - cephalexin
tell me to observe if it gets better or worse
blood test for liver function, kidney & full blood test
gives me antihistomine - Loratadine 10mg tab x1 for mornings
evening - i took antihistomine - hydroxyzine

15/7/2010 thu
face and body covered in itchy rashes
3-5pm red and incredibly itchy, hot. better after cold bath
8pm - took chlorpheniramine (ruuny nose med w antihistomine)
10pm - rashes better, took regular pills

16/7/2010 fri EEK!

2am eyes and face swollen bad, slight pain (above)
10am saw doctor. detailed report to doctor.
blood tests for liver & kidney function.
did not take regular pills 1 dose.
2pm saw skin specialist
- 3 skin specialists diagnose bad drug allergy to cephalexin
4pm warded, drank 2-3 jugs of water
all liver function & kidneys, full blood tests are normal (ttsh/nsc)
evening cocktail - steroids (prednisolone 30mg),
chlorpheniramine 4mg (anti itch)
steroid creams, aqua cream for dried face skin
10pm back on regular pills

17/7/2010 sat
2am terrible itch can't sleep
rashes subsided.
4pm doctors agree for discharge
large bag of medicines
10am/10pm regular pills continue

18/7/2010 sun
2am terrible itch on neck and itch on ears
took chlorpheniramine, back to sleep
7am terrible itch on neck still
8am dose of steroids, calcium, gastric pills, chlorpheniramine
10am itch remains but slightly better
10am/10pm stick to regular pills

on the day i got discharged 17/7/2010 (below 3 pix)



WORSE!! help!! 15/7/2010 after seeing ttsh & nsc (below)

14/7/2010 face rash & swollen eyes 9pm-9am :( (below)

13/7/2010 *gasp* rash!!! so damn itchy!! (below)

facing the rash 6-8am: YUCKY YUCK! :( :( (below)

warded 16/7 - 17/7/2010
- TTSH ward 71 bed 27 (below photos)
- lovely lovely room with a view (same as in 2004)

as for hospital food, i quickly opted for muslim meals... somehow, chinese food for hospital patients are always bland and blah... oooh, i was sooooo thrilled when the food came... for dinner was home-cooked asam pedas fish with rice, and for breakfast was a very warm and fuzzy bee hoon ayam soto soup... my my my...

i would have stayed one more day just to rest and get away from working at home, but i heard that the dengue cases had shot up and they expected some dengue patients to get warded... so, since i was depriving someone else of proper medical care, i packed and asked to leave this quaint restful sanctuary...

this is... to me, one of my most favourite places in the whole world...

just look at the garden view from by bedside!! (below)

updates - 1 august 2010, sat
i'm still on steroids (prednisolone) since hospital discharge on 17/7/2010 and will take the steroids for the next 7 days. HUNGRY all the time and i've got to eat big and eat lots... nasi lemak with ayam goreng, bergedel and sayur lodeh every morning is just heavenly, just not naturally what i would eat. by 1pm i'm hungry again and have some lunch, and by dinner... boy, the amt of rice i have on my plate scares me...

1st 7 days - 30mg/day (from the day i was warded)
next 7 days - 20mg/day
next 7 days - 10mg/day

today i had cravings for alow's laksa lemak with chicken... so got it cooked right from scratch...


last week i fried rice with ham and egg... so incredibly simple and satisfying!!!! yummm...


HUNGRY now!!! but don't think i should eat... restrain nette :(
masak uppa tomorrow ah?

guess what?
the root of the whole episode of rashes and swollen face... the disgusting skin issue on the leg is starting again, just after i started rubbing cream recommended by the skin specialist! damn!! it was getting better till then... so, stopped the cream application after 2 days. at least the ridiculous itching has stopped for now....

update again soon...
nette