no.16 Heaven is where God is - & God is with me

^{Ephesians 3:20
20}Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, ²¹to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.

every time i want to ask God for something, i hesitate. cos i know He will answer and deliver what i ask for, only in ways i do not like - he'd be ploinking me into some deep deep shit that i can't seem to tahan.

some people call this "suffering"...

When we ask God for Patience
- does he give us Patience?

When we ask God for Courage
- does he give us Courage?

What he gives us are...
OPPORTUNITIES.


my last prayer was so open ended. "Lord, what do u want of me and my life?" - i was too afraid to ask but i still uttered the words... yet, though i know what's coming (the storm before the sunshine), i never prepared myself for the unimaginable(s)!

so what am i rambling about?

i've prayed and now i get what i ask for...

i'm in deep deep shit!! It STINKS!

it's an answer for me to discover, learn, appreciate, embrace... through a series of trials and intense difficulties... God has answered, will answer again...

but i also just uttered another prayer, "God!! i can't take it any more! i feel like giving up... i can't go on like this! i don't want to suffer..."

and i guess i can see Him answer me with a little cheeky smile and a loving nudge:

the answer is "faith". 

wtf - wat kind of answer is that?

i got a hint of an answer at church yesterday. so through the sermon yesterday, i prayed for "eyes of faith"

- to see God - not through my eyes - because then, i'll limit myself, i'll stand too short, i'll be unable to reach, i'll be unable to see God's answer...

i have no idea how to proceed, except...

i must take the LEAP OF FAITH and trust on God's love. 

(and wtf does that mean??!)

so, i'll just plough on.

oh ya, ah ha, ah... ?? ??

after all, i'm a precious child of God...
And, i'm now in Heaven, where God will always be with me...

"Lord, what do u want of me and my life? 

I am here..."

me, nette